I appreciate this perspective and I believe in it wholeheartedly. In all harm done to us, we are expected to forgive, forget, turn the other cheek…and wait on the next time. I hate meaningless apologies. If done once and you (or an entire race in this instance) apologizes yet continues to do the same thing, then the apology is not sincere, the behavior has not (and will not change), and one should remove themselves from the path of the perpetrator (who has now become an enemy).
We tell victims of verbal and physical abuse in domestic relationships to remove themselves from harm, but Black victims (as well as other Brown victims of White abuse) must stay and pray for their abuser. Pray for their oppressor. Pray for their biblical slave master. Sometimes we are so heavenly bound we ain’t no earthly good.
It makes no sense to me, and I do not subscribe to it. People call me cynical, and mean…and even negative because I choose to protect myself. I practice self-care because in my opinion that’s the best care. This government has allowed White people to act as mini-tyrants in America for centuries. I’m refusing to allow people who say they pray to the same God as Blacks continue to inflict harm on us and then demand I forgive them (again).
I ain’t gone do it! My trauma, and re-traumas are valid. I’m taking care of me.
Thank you for breaking the tradition of asking us to forgive, especially when so many of us are living under duress right now. It’s appreciated.