I wish I could give this a million claps. You are absolutely correct and your thoughtful response touches on many topics we advocates deal with when dealing with sex, sexual assault, internet crimes, mental/cognitive impairments and the complexities of humanity.
I agree 100%. We are a punitive nation. We burden taxpayers with things that should be addressed outside of the court systems, with plain old education.
I agree 100% with your comment related to internet access and safety for kids. The only way to keep people safe is to keep them from the internet. Even internet and social media innovators admit how terrible it is, and don’t allow their own kids to use it, yet they push it on us to make us believe we can’t live without it.
How about those grey areas you mention, I am fully aware of them…like two kids having sex like teens do, but because one is 1–2 years older it violates statutory rape laws. A young girl has to prosecute her boyfriend because her parents are angry she’s having consensual sex. The law is the law…and now this young man has to register as a sex-offender, his life ruined for having consensual teen sex. I have seen so many different situations that seem unfair. But the law doesn’t always have common sense.
And let’s not even get it our response to people with mental impairments, cognitive impairments, and mental illness!
Your assessments are spot on, and I appreciate you taking the time to lay it out in detail about how screwed up our systems are. It’s very similar to entrapment, when the police lure you into a situation only to ensnare you. Same concept. Internet safety education and protections are non-existent currently.
I did not allow my kids to use smart phones until their junior senior year in high school, and computers were for homework only. My computer was in a common space, next to my bedroom, and I always checked the history and saved pages to view where they’d gone while surfing the net.
The only want to protect your children today is to have a low tech, no tech home. While no tech is nearly impossible with schools preferring computers and technology over books, I tell people to limit the net and computers to homework only. Let kids play, go to the library, read, ride bikes, and be a kid for as long as they can. Too much screen time eventually leads to many other issues that parents are not equipped to deal with. Kids learn how to do drugs, diet, huff, have sex, begin porn consumption, commit crimes, and do all sorts of things that are bad. Even if there aren’t bad intentions, coming across something bad by accident is all it takes to open the door to trouble.
Your points are valid, and my heart goes out to you. I hope your son is able to survive this experience. That’s an entirely different traumatic experience you must deal with that we didn’t even get into. I’m sorry you had to experience how broken and dysfunctional our nation’s institutions really are, but there are many like you caught in the middle.