…way to combat this line of thinking is to highlight how fully capable men are in the private sphere. It is true that American culture relishes in portraying men as dolts when it comes to parenting and cleaning, and it’s an unfair stereotype.
I would say it is true, just because of how differently boys and girls are raised. Boys are allowed to play, half-ass clean and maybe not do any house chores at all as we uphold traditional religious and patriarchal roles for boys and men. Mama serves daddy, and mom also allows the son to partake of boy stuff. Meanwhile girls are trained early through play how to cook (kitchen playsets and easy baker ovens), clean, take care of babies (via baby dolls), all while going to school, being responsible for some cooking household cooking (especially in some single parent households) siblings, or aiding mom and grandma with housekeeping.
We enable boys to be lazy men by allowing them to forgo indoor household chores for more “manly” outdoor shit yard work, car maintenance, video games, sports, or getting a job outside of the home early which reinforces working outside of the home is their jobs. It’s demonstrated very early on men should rely on wives and partners to maintain house and families.
I had friends who were proud they were sending their sons to live in college dorms without knowing how to cook or do their own laundry. They dragged dirty underwear home every two weeks if not sooner for mommy to do them for them. They did this the entire time they were in college. I only had sons and I prepared them to not only care for themselves but not be a woman’s burden. Living in a home requires partnering on chores to keep the peace and lighten a woman’s burden. I made sure my sons understood the pressures of maintaining a home. Now their issue is most young women their age can’t cook (not well), aren’t interested in maintaining a home. If it’s not taught in the home to both boys and girls at an early age, it’s hard to learn on the fly as an adult, and a little too late as well in my opinion.
A mom and/or grandma can be their son’s best ally and in many cases his worst enemy.