It happened to me. The same person came across a few stories I had written about them, or aspects of our relationship. They were angry, of course they never view themselves in the light we see them in. I deleted the essays. The person wanted to dictate how I wrote about MY life. I felt if I couldn’t speak my truth, I wouldn’t tell it. They stalked my stories for a year or so. It made me feel yucky, violated. I agree with your point. Now I write under a pen name and I don’t tell anyone about my work.
I guess I’m in bondage now.