This was a great response for men with this question. I would add that the physical and emotional trauma she/he has carried for years are like war injuries. Their victim(s) hurt everyday. They’ve impacted her/his past, current, and future relationships, her/his mental stability, her/his confidence, her/his lifetime earning potential, and her overall mental health and well-being.

She/he is a different person today because of his sexually deviant acts. Her/his abuser nonchalantly changed the trajectory of his/her entire life forever with his act, and his apology, listening, or other prescribed remedies will not put her back onto the proper path.

I also appreciate you noting that the apology is more for the abuser to quell his guilt than it is to bring closure to a victim. You identified the real motives. Remorse is good. An apology is great. But neither will repair the trauma. Men need to understand that when engaging in conversations with victims.

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