You are absolutely correct. I consider myself a very open-minded person, but Zayn’s article really got me thinking about what would I do if I were in a similar situation. I’m a very fluid, situational person (and a sapiosexual- lol another label). If you ain’t talking right, I can’t get into you. If your everything is together, we can make power moves. The more I read about dating issues experienced by my Trans family, I become more conscious (and sensitive) of what’s going on around me.

Exclusion from the dating pool should definitely be explored more in-depth. But like some people and their voting habits, they will never tell the truth about what they did or why because of the stigma and shame. I think there are a lot of people who would date trans men and women, but due to the stigma associated with being LGBTQ, experimentation (especially in Brown communities) the lack of privacy (too many risks online, nothing is safe Ashley Madison). In person is not safe, private, or acceptable either. As long as the stigma and discrimination persists, we will have such exclusions.

I had to get old as hell before I decided to taste the rainbow (lol). Part of my problem was stigma, part of it was fear, and part was I don’t think I would appreciate my partner today had I not gone through what I did with men. Sometimes we aren’t ready for a Zayn, and sometimes it is indeed discrimination. I love delving into these taboo topics. I love your courage and strength, your openness and your honesty. It’s a beautiful thing.

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